Parents nagging me to get married

Last UpdatedMarch 5, 2024

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My mother brings out the worst in me. Though it played a small role in postponing the marriage topic , they agreed mainly because of some prediction from an astrologer stating it was not a good time to get married in 2020-2021. That’s cruel to parents. I experience the same thing from time to time. She’s been pestering me about marriage ever since I was 13. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. I have been studying but my parents have begun to keep on nagging about how I should stop working out and start studying. now, nagging nonstop would be bad. Airport. They are always around when you invite your friends home and often eavesdrop on your conversations. 3. true. I deeply value marriage and he tells me this is the best relationship he has ever had, he loves me, and he wants to spend his life with me…but he does not want to get married because he says he thinks he will feel like he was “pressured” into getting married. Now getting the pressure to make babies from in laws ( which we definitely are not prepared for mentally and financially). They refuse to even meet him. I also didn't want to get married right then coz i had just gotten a job and i wanted to enjoy life and save some money before I get married. Tell him everything and decide where to go as a team. Inshalah if your parents aren't too adamant or manipulative, you should be ok. ## Welcome to r/ArrangedMarriage! First things first: if you're new to our… NTA. Parents want to get that done while they still are physically and monetarily able to do it. Nagging mostly happens when there is a lack of communication. it’s not inappropriate for you to express your wants to your boyfriend. And if you suggesting to adopt child that’s cool but you need to understand “apna khoon apna hi hota h”. Jan 1, 2023 · After my husband and I became marriage coaches, we learned there are many ways that death can be felt in a relationship. Neither of them has any leverage over the other to control the relationship, which is probably for the best, but it means neither has any incentive to change. My parents immigrated here from India, but unfortunately for me, they still cling to the ridiculous and outdated cultural norms from India-primary among them that you have to get married to someone of the same race and caste. Im 15m and I am just sick of my parents. There is very little they are capable of doing, and since my mother refuses to allow outside help, many things end up not getting done (i. Wow, just gotta say that from the outside, this sounds like a very aware, well adjusted perspective and a concise way to break down the dynamic. • 11 min. e. A large amount of men in India are raised to believe they are responsible for their parents as the get older. Posted by u/adam_mars98 - 30 votes and 3 comments 14 votes, 13 comments. Parents, no matter how old you are, will treat you like property and a possession. ” . My mother and I do not get along. My parents (50ish) want me to get married because according to them (mom is the most vocal about it), 23-24 is the perfect age to get married and that once I get to 26 it gets harder and harder (comparing me with her friends' sons). She says I should be married by the time I’m 23. But you know how parents Sep 3, 2018 · Part of the pressure young people feel to get married is cultural — marriage is widely seen in China as a mandatory part of adulthood. For me, I could have the picket fence and 2+ kids and a great job and my parents would still be critical about how I'm living my life. We do not have any age-restriction in place but do keep in mind this is targeted for users between the ages of 13 to 19. Parents want me to get married I hate how they started to bring up how I’d need to get married when not long ago they wanted me to focus on school and not to think of dating anyone. Constant reminders. Now things are trying to be reconciled and i am confused whether we should g Jul 16, 2009 · The greatest textbook on marriage is the sacred Scripture, which reveals God’s wisdom and His rule governing the marriage relationship. silentscope90210. 2. It is not haram if you refuse to marry someone of your parent’s choice. Its doable but its not as easy as we thing. Maneka actually lived at home with her parents, so the pressure wasn't contained to Nov 4, 2019 · Close friends, significant others, and support groups, or sometimes even your work buddies, are good places to start. Fiancée and her family kept nagging me to lose weight. I'm not ready to get married, let alone comfortable agreeing to marry someone after two hours of talking to them, let alone live the same religious lifestyle my parents My Parents do not want me to get married. And it’s your obedience to Him that is most important. I hate parties and having a gf is unthinkable for me, so it makes me angry when my dad naggs me like this. [Rant/Vent] My mother just never stops nagging me about any and everything she can. He enrolled in college in Utah, and we moved there. My ex still had a marriageable window of about five years, which he treated as a privilege, like many other Indian men. I'm 26 years old yet she treats me like I'm a small child. Make your own plans. I've had pressure in the form of questions and worries that I'm getting older and that other relatives around my age have been getting married. It takes a lot of organization and money. Parents, teachers, and the like are welcomed to participate and ask any questions! whenever i do anything my parents always nag me about it they always say that im not using my brain or using common sense when im just trying to do what they told me they would tell me to do one thing and then tell me to do another like i have flexible with 7 arms i accidentally spelt my dads drink today and he just started screaming at me i didnt even see it it was beside his seat this Dec 17, 2020 · Yeah you could push him to marry you before he's ready but that could end in disaster. Excuse yourself for a quick bathroom break I know of some places like library or parks,but would like more places too, thanks reddit. 5. It would be haram for your family to cut ties with you. Feelings got hurt and marriage was called off. Pushy parents want a say in their children’s relationships. You are free at your will pertaining to the decision of you marriage. It has been 10 years. Oct 24, 2021 · Politely ignore them. Although our parents suggested for us to get married earlier, we had an agreement at that point in time that it was too early for us. It’s genuinely getting on my nerves. I'm a 25 year old female. " But when his sister falls off her bike, his dad runs to pick her up and give her a hug. 5 years ago, and am on the cusp of my 30s. For ease in identifying The only problem is that my parents are not as supportive of my new life. Parents, teachers, and the like are welcomed to participate and ask any questions! Aug 31, 2018 · Of course, parents are positive that without nagging their child absolutely will not get to bed on time or study for the test. In some cases, kids do need close monitoring – but this doesn’t AITA - Needy, Nagging Parents Expect Free Labor from Me/Willing to Pay Others My parents are both remarkably incapable. Any pair of people can get stuck in the respective roles of nagger or resister (parent and child, boss and employee). This should be a happy, exciting time for you, and you should focus on the people who are supporting you and showing enthusiasm for your big news. Turns out pretending to be preggers is hard work. He said: “As for me, I marry women. We exist to provide a safe haven for all followers of Jesus Christ to discuss God, Jesus, the Bible, and information relative to our beliefs, and to provide non-believers a place to ask questions about Christianity as explained in the scriptures, without fear of mockery or debasement. My mum has been nagging at me to have a baby since this year (before I get May 19, 2014 · It should be noted that marriage is part of the teachings and practice of the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him). Remember that Allah is the provider of your finances, and your parents are only a vessel. however, making him aware that you want to at least be engaged by the time you’re 27 (or however old you consider late 20s) is totally fine. Since you seem to have a good relationship with them, they should respect your feelings. It got so bad we both agreed to just leave. Never married, and makes decent money. Mar 2, 2024 · // Jia Han, a 32-year-old freelancer with no work, is tired of her parents nagging her to get married and finally move out. " They get mad constantly whenever I don't know how to do something and blame it all on me being on my pc all the time. `A’isha reported that the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Kinship (rahim) is derived from Allah. It is May right now and the SAT is coming up in a week. Close your room’s door, pop on some headphones, or hop on a phone call with somebody. Feb 27, 2024 · 1. He runs to his mother for comfort, because his father always says, "Only sissies cry. Some will feel their parents are nagging, overprotective and/or over-involved and will resist Aug 18, 2023 · Kinship. 1 Share. I used to feel bad for telling her off but it's like I have no other choice because May 9, 2018 · The “right marriageable age” or the average marriage age in Indian society for women is 22 to 28 and for men is 24 to 30. There is no reason to "need" us. Hospital (A lot of waiting areas). We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. My parents, on the other hand don’t want to give it a chance. Our Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) rebuked those who wanted to remain unmarried. It's got to the point to where I'm telling her to stop, sometimes to outright stop talking. These reminders may create a feeling of being constantly watched or criticized, leading to tension in the relationship. My Wife constantly nagging at me. You will probably always have a complicated relationship with your parents, but you shouldn't have a complicated relationship with your boyfriend, just talk to him. I wish I hadn’t got married at all. dot. They sign me up for extra piano, badminton, violin, and math lessons that I don't like, and they say I'll "thank them later" and "I am ungrateful. My parents Answers (3) Answer #1. I feel like I do a pretty good job as a husband/father. First of all the right/legal age for marriage of any boy is 21 and for any girl is 18 - complete. Sep 21, 2018 · Then, reassure your parent (s) that when you find someone you really love, they'll be the first to know. Start by deciding what is best for you. They started right when I was in last year of college so I was 21/22 years old. We had set a timeline to get married around the age of 28/29 and we stuck by that regardless of external pressures. You may lack initiative, as you are too used to them making decisions for you. I got married cause of my parents nagging me everyday. You can use a similar template Summon your internal energy or resolve. Ever since I turned 22 my parents have been pushing guys on to me and arranging meetings between our families. Alhamdulillah he is an Aalim and a qari. My Apr 27, 2016 · Adjust accordingly so it sounds like you, and repeat whenever necessary. Good writing. Be polite and courteous to each other. Parents forcing me to get married. Definitely think about what the expectations she's placing you are and whether or not that's how you want to live your life. A young boy falls and scrapes his knee while playing outside. But that's about it. 2nd thing is nobody can force you to get married or to marry any particular person. 3 per 1,000 people — significantly higher than the OECD average of 4. You can also ask them why they want you to get married and why they are so mentally preoccupied with it. I mean, there’s a lot of middle ground between a big, family wedding and an elopement. As a parent you don’t want to be in the 60a and still trying to get your kids done with college and settled. In 2016, China’s marriage rate was 8. Arguing and answering back is only going to make matters worse. If your parents begin to nag you for something new, chances are they won't give you a strict deadline to follow. I dislike her to the point where if I weren’t Muslim, I would have left my parents to live on my own and visit them infrequently. Rather, she’s sporting a slight baby bump as part of her role as a free-spirited surrogate mum in upcoming Ch 8 drama Babies on Board. What happen to my parents doesn't necessarily happen to me. The endless nagging. Dec 10, 2012 · Let me tell you first about how nagging develops. If you love Jesus, you will want to obey Him ( John 14:15 ). Nagging parents. I wish I could just be alone, work and look after my parents. For kid matter, it should be discussed out with your bf before marriage. I work about 60-70 a hour a week on average, I cook, clean, run errands, walk the dog, do the dishes, sometimes do the laundry but yet she always Parents always nagging me about technology. Beyond stressed and don't know what to do. My Asian mother wants me to get married. From my personal experience my parents didn't even ask me when they started searching for a groom. Aug 31, 2009 · Our earthly parents are only a dim reflection of Him (as your own situation so aptly illustrates). You might find that the nagging stops. When we tell you not to answer back, it doesn’t mean that you need to stay quiet and let your wife keep nagging you. Just try not to lose your calm or antagonize them as that can truly make matters worse. I have an uncle who's around 40. Not us. Man as a person almost in your shoes, i would say no. He said he never wanted to get married. It began with completing homework at the very last second and playing games during class, but now it has escalated to not doing homework at all and not even Feb 28, 2023 · Synopsis: Jia Han, a 32-year-old freelancer with no work, is tired of her parents nagging her to get married and finally move out. Jul 3, 2013 · If, on the other hand, it’s clear that your boyfriend is the man whom you are called to marry — if your friends, your gut, and your prayers all say “yes” — then take him by the hand Oct 5, 2010 · They know that the moment they suggest attending a HeroPath For Teens™ program, their teen will reject it simply because it is a suggestion coming from their parents! Their teen will feel their parents are putting too much pressure on them to change. Let your mother’s words flow past you. Parents can't force you to get married, and as you're a guy, I think it might be easier for you to reject proposals from people than for women to reject. The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver During that year my family tried forcing me into a marriage but I threatened them saying I would run away or kill myself . If my parents seriously tried to pressure me, I would simply tell them that I'm not ready to get married and that I would when I'm ready and find someone. 4. They hardly ever let you be. It feels like I have no decision (related to me) under my control. It wasn’t enough that I was married at 18, they wanted me to have a kid too. I'm getting married soon. I’m 18. When she runs into her childhood friend, Mincheol Jin, who is also feeling the same pressure from his parents, she blurts out that they should just get married to solve both of their problems. It takes both Sep 26, 2023 · Tell them that these conversations are making you unhappy. May 6, 2024 · 1. Communicate: It’s crucial to keep in constant contact with your family. She dislikes me to the extent where at this point (since I’m 21) she just wants to get married and leave the house. I have been with my partner for over ten years and we’ve been engaged for eight. Society tends to change faster than the laws. Talk to your boyfriend, if he loves you and respects your feelings, he will understand. [deleted] Failing college. Little did she know he'd accept her suggestion, and she suddenly finds herself A place for sharing the for-better and for-worse of marriage. The end. Take some time to sit and talk at least once a week. But ask that, until then, they put an end to marriage talk. 8. Keep your calendar fully booked. I’m still pissed at them. Don’t avoid your family or friends; resist peer or family pressure. Cached. Set a concrete deadline. If someone earnestly wants to do the will of God in marriage, his first task is to master what the Scripture says that God requires in such a relationship. Next time they mention a new task for you to do, give them a time you'll do it by, so long as they agree to stop nagging you about it. A nagging wife might frequently remind her partner about tasks, whether they’ve been forgotten or not, leading to feelings of being micromanaged. My parents have been nagging me for a long time, and according to them, soon I'll be too old. Sort by: Add a Comment. Note that my parents have complete independence. Feb 10, 2022 · Jia Han, a 32-year-old freelancer with no work, is tired of her parents nagging her to get married and finally move out. I don’t understand how a strong career oriented woman like herself think I should I get married before I’m 23 when she didn’t even get married until she was 25. May 23, 2023 · How to handle the pressure dot. No, you may not get the big, family wedding of your dreams, but perhaps it’s time to adjust your fantasy. They do not know, realize, or care that they are being rude. Here are five common issues we see in couples: Lack of attraction to your If it goes out of my mind and onto paper, I don’t have to keep repeating in my head “don’t forget x, y, and z. Don’t answer back. Whoever turns away from my Sunnah (my way) is not of me. Especially my mom. If you have a feeling that your wife’s nagging isn’t actually about taking out the trash, take some time to consider what the issue really is. When your wife nags you, you need to understand that she is in a hostile state of mind. 74K subscribers in the Arrangedmarriage community. Repetition of requests. Be assured: Be assured and steadfast in whatever you choose to do. Wife is constantly nagging, never seems happy. My parents have been staying with my spouse and I for an extended period. She’s calling me a lazy piece of crap sitting on my ass all day even though I literally applied to a bunch of places and like I said I get no calls back. Assalaamualaikum I’m a twenty two year old female, and I have met someone I am ready to get married to. I am in my 30s and mom consistently makes remarks about me having a beard. My parents keep nagging to me about it like it’s my fault. I am confident I will get to a great university and do not see what they are worrying so much Girlfriend from secondary school stuck by me past my diabetes diagnosis. Their marriage is broken but somehow they still think “everyone needs to get married” and I will be a disgrace in the family if I’m not getting married Dec 4, 2018 · With an overwhelming sense that nothing is enough, teens can become bored, anxious, depressed, and apathetic. She has 2 other younger children who have yet to date anyone she can push her shit onto. r/depression. Nagging is a pattern that develops over time and involves two people. Maybe putting it all down on a list that both you and your partner could keep visible would be a way for you to clear your mind and for you to remind him without having to remind him. LGBTQ. You are not alone. Here's the situation. They will treat you like a child. Focus on your strength and feel your power. Though if anyone do, you can approach police or samaj kalyan Dec 17, 2008 · I came from a broken family. I am in a successful stable career where I have to work 10+ hours every day to even get an 'average/meets expectations' rating at the end of the year. • 9 yr. Moreover, in the past women could be essentially destitute without make support as jobs that paid well were more in men's hands. And believe me, if anyone told me when I met my SO that it would be 10 years before we got married I would have said no way I would wait that long! But life happens and you get married when the time is right for both of you. Re-frame the issue. Maybe 20 years ago dad was gone all the time Apr 29, 2024 · 3. It is definetly not a mortal sin, because you are an adult, and your father has no right to want something from you that may be potentialy sinful. But, no, it’s not her food baby. Even South Korea and Japan, two nations also heavily influenced by Confucian culture, have When we were married we both agreed it was kind of weird and we should have waited, then my parents kept nagging me about a baby. Sep 9, 2020 · A passive situation will help them understand things better and also make them realize that there are better ways to communicate with family. And similarly for desis wedding is a big deal. Hey. As parents do, they made passive-aggressive comments about how we utilize our time - particularly what time we leave our bedroom on weekends when we have nothing planned. It’s not a huge deal to us. Cleaning the house, preparing meals, etc). Please stop getting influence by the shitty western culture, you gonna ruined your world anyway. We are way to busy. ago. Jun 28, 2022 · Try spending a little more quality time with her. I disagree with your point of having kids without getting married, I really don’t get your point. Maintain open communication with your parents. The idea of abandoning your parents is like religious people to be told well leave your faith. The woman is seen as the better caretaker, and is also seen as being dependent on the male's support to provide for the kids. Especially remember Rule 1: Be polite and civil. identification with the same-sex paren. Subtly remove yourself from the vicinity. If you don't want kid and he wants kid, it may build up his resentment over time. ”. Ya Hui is looking swell — literally. Lately, my anxiety and stress over school has dissolved into apathy. My parents are still pretty traditional and in our culture the parents play a big part with the marriage. votes. If they say they just want you to be happy, you can say that you are happy, and that you will How do you deal with your parents nagging you to have children? I got married 1. Neither is it the extra holiday weight she's carrying after her recent trip to China. I keep telling them that I’m genuinely trying but they don’t believe me. We’re not just supposed to obey our parents, but also God ( Deuteronomy 32:45-47 ). Now I’m curious if anyone experiences the opposite - where the parents are very wary of their kids getting married too early or to the “wrong” spouse, to the extent they’d rather the kids remain single til the right one doesn’t come along. Her response is always “well what will the baby’s last night be then?” “She will get bullied cause her parents aren’t married!” I’m kind of over her and her shit. Our subreddit is primarily for discussions and memes that an average teenager would enjoy to discuss about. Focus on your breath, stay centered, and let her words go by. Its a foundational pillar of their personality/being. Your controlling parents may want a say in your relationships. the worst thing you can let happen is not saying anything about it then blowing up on him However my mother keeps nagging me, telling me that being a janitor is not a real job and that I should actually get one that has a degree, she says that because I was born here in Canada, I have opportunities that alot of people don’t and that unlike my cousins who immigrated here I’m fortunate enough to be given something they would kill A subreddit for Christians of all sorts. qj jo nc ly ec co wl bl dw he